miss angie's getaway
as we grow older, as we continue to change with age
there is one thing that will never change, i will always keep falling in love with you
two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one
i love you, not only for who you are, but for who i am when i am with you
- this is the
introduction page, you can back to the main page
- this is about
miss angie, it is all about me
- this is my
story journey, all my blog post, sharings
- this is my
tag page, tag me and talk to me
- this is my
affiliates page, my friends' blog :)
- these are my
memories, my past entries, all here :)
- these are my
desires 2011, my wishlists, my goals
- this is a
heartfelt, dedication page, where i write dedications to
- this is the
miscellaneous page, other stuff :)
miss angie's getaway
as we grow older, as we continue to change with age
there is one thing that will never change, i will always keep falling in love with you
two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one
i love you, not only for who you are, but for who i am when i am with you
- this is the
introduction page, you can back to the main page
- this is about
miss angie, it is all about me
- this is my
story journey, all my blog post, sharings
- this is my
tag page, tag me and talk to me
- this is my
affiliates page, my friends' blog :)
- these are my
memories, my past entries, all here :)
- these are my
desires 2011, my wishlists, my goals
- this is a
heartfelt, dedication page, where i write dedications to
- this is the
miscellaneous page, other stuff :)
Sunday, September 26, 2010 ♥
i have a lot of thoughts in my mind.. and i am penning it down so i can let my 2 avid readers, ying and yun know.. i am not in my right state of my mind.. i had been crying for e past 2 hours.. i have no idea why.. i tend to cry to myself at home, in the bathroom. to stop myself from crying, i slap myself.. i do.. my head is spinning right now.. i cant breathe.. it's controlling me..
during these half a year, my mind had been torturing me.. my heart is torturing even more.. i struggled so much emotionally and mentally.. but i couldnt find someone to understand and accompany me through.. maybe i needed someone who can be there 24/7.. you see, i am just behaving like a kid.. a kid's mentality.. what am i doing.. what am i thinking?
my sister told me after we were at NUH.. we saw many cases like mine.. it's just that i still know how to control and i am not yet admitted to ward 12.. i was down with depression that time but i rejected all sorts of help.. people believe that i am strong enough.. but no one sees a fact that without strengths and encourages, how can i move on with all those courage? my memory is failing me.. and sis adviced me not to be so depressed at times.. but.. i have a thinking.. i rather have dementia.. i rather not remember.. i rather.. i vanish..
i gave myself 3 weeks.. 3 weeks in exact, i will be 22nd.. i will make a final decision of my life.. that's what i share with a friend.. he asked what makes me hold on to a r/s.. i shared with him.. if you used your time to find someone who can be a boyfriend, a soulmate, a buddy, a best friend or even a lifelong partner.. if you had been through so much with him.. how can you let go so easily? if only the past stays on..
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..Love
emo angie 6:58 PM
Saturday, September 25, 2010 ♥
cleaning up my mobile photos. finally uploaded some photos which are supposed to be up on july.. it's gonna be month end again.. almost 2 months there.. work load increased.. i am gonna overcome it.. having mixed feeling still.. :( someone please help me..
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..Love
emo angie 8:37 PM
:(
Wednesday, September 15, 2010 ♥
maybe i will never find what i want again.. i just hate this world.. =) i am very disappointed with a friend.. a friend whom i know for a period.. jealously and him makes our friendship soured again. how many times must we lose this friendship? seriously, this is the last.. i am not going to salvage this friendship. good bye. because you dont deserve my care.. simple.. you dont appreciate, i am going to take it back all..
it seems that dad's condition is not getting any better.. i feel quite upset.. there's nothing i can do.. mum is also frustrated.. hais.. i am caught in between so many things.. work? maybe sucks a little.. i almost felt nothing for everything.. even kept so much things to myself.. this month planned quite a number of gathering.. tomorrow i am going to meet up juliana, quek and chenghwee.. but before that i am going back to workplace.. great.. please, no disturbance during my next week off days..
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..Love
emo angie 5:31 PM
heartfelt words
Friday, September 3, 2010 ♥
如果你看到一个人，有心痛的感觉。。。你会怎样应付呢？从没在这里用中文诉说自己的感觉。心里其实很不开心，很无奈，很不平衡，很厌倦这种生活，很不喜欢这种对待。。。这么近，那么远。。。哪里有彩虹告诉我。能不能把我的愿望还给我？为什么天那么安静？所有的云都跑到我这里。也许时间是一种解药。也是我现在正服下的毒药。。。
我好喜欢蒲公英的约定这首歌。。。不知道为什么。或许曾经它是那么的贴切。我也许表面坚强了很多。。。但我的内心韧然的害怕，孤独，自卑。因为勇气，我才能走下去。心中的恨，或许我不恨她，只是讨厌她。我昨天说的，"THF, i hate you for everything.." 我不是开玩笑。心中的结，永远都结不开。。。我不恨人。我也不恨她。但我很不喜欢这种不公平，无奈的感觉。沉默，是因为麻木了。。。
叶伟康，你已经是过去了。。。不要再进入我的人生，我的脑海。。。
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..Love
emo angie 12:28 AM
my desires 2011
to healthier miss angie
slim down xD
attain my driving license
master swimming skills
draw out new business plan
revise current business plan
study new skills at WDA
heartfelt notes
my family
it was a struggle, struggling year for us. i will never forget who brought me up. and that is my family. mum, you had been so great. i am sorry that i havent been a very good daughter to you. i love you so much. dad, thank you for raising me up. it pains me to see the struggles you are going through now. but still, i will not give you up.
shawn yeo
my dear boy, in my journey with you, you taught me so much things, walk with me, have fun with me. two plus years back, i said, i found someone who makes me feel like a girl, a woman, someone who is like a friend, buddy, boyfriend, husband and soulmate of mine. now, i still hold on to what i say. you are always so sweet and nice. i am really glad that we had chosen the path and that is to walk together.
guigui family
hey da gui & er gui, it's wonderful knowing you guys. cheers to our friendship, 5 years! though we had ups & downs in our route, but no matter what, i really hope this friendship goes on even as we grow older. thank you girls for giving me encouragements, helps. though we seldom meet, talk, i truly appreciate you people. cheers to our friendship :)
juliana, lishing & qiufeng
i will never forget the few people whom i know during my secondary adventures. juliana, i am glad with what you are achieving now. it's really fortunate to be still living in the same place with you. not like lishing, whom is still in taiwan and qiufeng, in USA but uncontactable.
lishing, my dear sister. you had been wanting to come back to singapore, but dont fret. we will wait for you.. though days spent with you are short, and most of the days are based on letters and emails, i really cherish it as it is not easy to maintain a relationship like this.
qiufeng, i saw your family back.. but it's really sad not to see you back. i wonder how you are doing, i wonder where you are. i never forget the day where we part at changi airport. i miss you, your laughters.
qianying
hey love, it's been 10 years since you left the world. how are you doing up there? it was really a big loss for me. but now, i have done you proud. i miss you girlie. i am doing fine. i hope you are. i will continue to move on with my life. and you are always in my heart.
bsmc mates
hey guys, you know who you guys are. there's a particular 2 person i wish to mention here though you guys dont read my blog. huifen and norh. thanks for the protection, the care for me. huifen, you know? you are just like the friend i had lost almost 10 years. it was a gift for me from the god. norh, thank you so much concerns, sms-es, calls. i am really glad to have you by my side. it was crazy with you. we can laugh, talk serious, anything under the sun. i am so impressed and proud of you. :)
